Wicked Wednesday: The Grand Old Duke of York

As nursery rhymes either have a moralistic tale interwoven, or generally have hidden meanings, I have tried to replicate this here. This is an alternative version of the Grand Old Duke of York.

The Grand Old Duke of York, he had ten thousand men,
They all had nasty thoughts, for Yorkie’s daughter Jen.
The marching conquerors desperate, they had a thirst to quench,
To screw a virgin pussy, or find a dirty wench.

Yorkie paid good money, and offered lots of coins;
For any filthy lady, who’d enjoy his soldiers’ groins.
Inundated with offers, the lady of the town,
Desperate for a ravaging, to have hands up their gown.

Soldiers looked so dangerous, so likely to excite,
The women got their rogering, each and every night.
The men they got to screw, to suck and loudly fuck,
But some men wanted anal, and they were out of luck.

But several men were desperate, for some fun backdoor,
And the ladies did reply, than anal they did abhor.
The soldiers promised butter, or any amount of lube,
But the women: they said no, and flashed the guys some boob!

So the men they started playing, and messing in their dorm,
Cuddling up together and keeping themselves warm.
Using stolen butter, to grease up their butts,
And rubbing slippery fingers over conquering nuts.

And like Peeping Toms, the filthy women spied.
On horny desperate men, spreading buttocks wide.
Panting and aroused, the women loved the sight,
Of men buggering men, of knight fucking knight.

The ladies touched each other, fingers on their slits,
Every wanton woman, licking another’s clit.
But their squealing wasn’t heard; the men they couldn’t hear
Of young ladies climaxing, when cock was up their rear!

So Yorkie learned a lesson, that some men do like guys,
And women needed more, than cocks oversized.
Some men wanted men, thrown upon their bed,
Some girls loved each other, eagerly giving head.

Tolerance reined supreme, and Yorkie didn’t mind,
What sort of sex, his randy subjects inclined.
Nobody gave a monkeys, whether straight or bi or gay,
As long as they win the battles, York would win the day.

Wicked Wednesday


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