I can’t say that both of my children were planned pregnancies, or even one of them; at a push I might argue that my second was my wife and I thinking that we would want a second child soon, and were a little more relaxed with contraception. The first was completely unplanned: I was still at University when we found out.
Indeed, at no point in my life have I ever had sex to produce children; they’ve been by-products of a soup of uncontrolled lust and irresponsible carelessness. But, from Gaia’s perspective, the overriding reason to give me dangly bits below the waist, and an appropriate slot in the female gender, was to create babies: to reproduce, and continue my line of genes.
Using that logic, I have succeeded. I look at both of my kids and see traits of my personality running through them. But that is only a small part of the equation: as the saying says, anyone one can be a father, but it takes someone special to be a daddy.
And yes, they challenge me; some things are their conscious choices, other things they cannot help. They evoke despair and pride, joy and fear, but they are 50% my DNA and are my responsibility until the day I die.
And the reason for all of this, is because over a decade ago, a young man didn’t quite get the rhythm of the withdrawal method right, and filled his fiancée with something she wasn’t expecting. But it didn’t matter, she wasn’t “due on” and it was just the once; what’s the worst that can happen?!
Well, only a parent can really answer that.
Image used under Creative Commons license from here.